Thursday, January 16, 2014

Thoughts on a Thursday Morning

 

Fifteen days into the New Year and I feel as if I've barely begun to catch up. Being sick was NOT the way I had hoped to spend the *changing of the colors* so to speak, but it was and I've just this week begun to feel like doing anything other than sleeping and staying under the blankets. Even though I am feeling so much better, the voice still comes and goes as it chooses without any warning at times, and there is a  lingering cough that decided to show up at some of the strangest times. Other than that, I'm feeling pretty good, have begun to be more active even though I still find a nap works well on some afternoons. I've had 2 weeks to reflect on 2013, determine what I didn't like about it and then decide how to make changes for the better for this year. I admit 2013 was a bitch and I had my ass kicked on more than one occasion. Thankfully lessons learned and the debris has been cleared for the new path we are walking...

For a while now I've been writing things about how the everyday happenings in life are going with a few rants on various subjects that have been known to irritate the hell outta me thrown in here and there. After moving Aoibheal's Lair to self-hosting I went through all my posts that had been imported from Blogger, read each and every one of them and then deleted some of the ones that really had no bearing on my life as it is now. They were the ones I call Vickie's *dumb phase*. Luckily, I feel I've grown a bit over the past 7 or so months and no longer have the obsession to write about all things that make me angry as I previously had been doing. I believe my life has changed directions and as a result, I want to align the things I have to say with those changes. Now, this is not to say there won't be any more rants or anger. I'm sure every now and then there will be since the main purpose of this blog is me having a readily accessible outlet for free therapy.

You know that old saying about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer? I am guilty of living by that. And I've caught myself checking to see what those I consider to be enemies are doing, what they are saying and who they are talking about now. I want to say here and now, I'm finished with that obsession. It was blocking me from growing, I couldn't get past the what if phase. You know, the what if they are talking about me, or about someone who is my friend, or what are they doing now... I can't do this anymore, it's unproductive and unhealthy. I have more than enough in my life to keep me not only occupied but also more than busy. So, last night, on this Full Moon Wolf Moon night, I said goodbye to and released the habit of checking up on those who have no bearing on my life as it is now or the future I am building for my family and friends.

 

Something else has been bothering me a bit and until last night I couldn't understand why it kept niggling at me. My friend Eliora does a Shout Out on her Twitter feed about those in her circle of friends who are of the crafty persuasion, whether it be in handcrafting jewelry, writing books or a blog, or any other handmade, heartfelt project. I'm on that list with Aoibheal's Lair, she calls us an awesome Pagan Blogger. Except, I don't feel so much of the awesome or the Pagan part at this time. My blog has been mired in so much yuck, that the Pagan part of me has gone unnoticed for a very long time. I have this driving *need* to change things here and bring back the Witchy Vickie, the one who writes about my Pagan life, my encounters with Deity, and the Faeries, and showcase some of the craft projects I have made in the past and have on my *to do* list for the coming year. I am hoping to be able to begin walking on this renewed path with this weeks Sunday edition of Aoibheal's Lair...

 

2 comments:

  1. Darlin, your blog IS awesome! As so are you. You need to stop criticizing yourself so much. It's a downward spiral into depression when you do that. Eliora is right in giving you that shoutout. You deserve it.

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  2. Thanks Leeanna for the vote of confidence! And you are absolutely correct, I DO need to stop criticizing myself, hence the new outlook and reworked path on my journey. Love you!

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